How to learn Chinese in 5 minutes funny, as it may happen to seem to you, is in fact a very doable proposition if you devote only the minimal amount of time (5 minutes a day) to this difficult and no doubt challenging, yet worthwhile and beneficial, undertaking. In fact, “How to learn Chinese in 5 minutes funny” is a highly unique method of learning the Chinese language, one which is especially designed for those people who are very busy and can only devote the most minimal effort to learn the Chinese language. In order to learn Chinese in as little as only 5 minutes a day, you must follow the following instructions: read aloud the following commonly used 16 phrases (first the phrase in English, then its Chinese equivalence), which if done daily will give you quite a strong foundation upon which to build your basic Chinese vocabulary. Even though the following 16 phrases are few in numbers, they are quite broad in their scope covering a good number of situations in which an individual may use Chinese to converse with the locals of a Chinese-speaking country, such as when traveling abroad in China or Taiwan or Hong Kong, which has been absorbed back into China in the year of 2007 from Great Britain who did a great job of transforming Hong Kong from a poor area into at a time the most wealthy place in the world as measured by per capita.
The first phrase is quite useful as while traveling abroad in China or Taiwan or Hong Kong, you may be incorrectly charge for an item you want to purchase or erroneous billed for services. Read aloud “That’s not right!,” then say “Sum Ting Wong.”
The second phrase is useful if you are a law enforcement officer, and you suspect a non-English speaking Chinese person, citizen or otherwise, of providing shelter to a criminal. Say “Are you harboring a fugitive?,” then “Hu Yu Ha i Ding.”
The third phrase is useful when you are talking to a non-English speaking Chinese person on the phone and you want to converse with the person in person, for example, concerning a topic that would be consider impolite or even rude to discuss over the phone. Say “See me ASAP!,” then Kum Hia Nao.
The fourth phrase may prove handy while traveling abroad in China or Taiwan or Hong Kong following a terrible mishap and you need to vent your frustration to the man who has made the unfortunate error. Say “Stupid Man!” then “Dum Fuk.”
The fifth phrase is useful to know when visiting Macao, which used to be a Portuguese colony but is inhabited and governed by Chinese people. Say “Small Horse,” then “Tai Ni Po Ni.”
The sixth phrase is useful to know if you have Chinese friends or desire to make friends with people of Chinese descent residing in your country. Say “Did you go to the beach?,” then “Wai Yu So Tan.”
The seventh phrase may come in handy while traveling abroad in China, Taiwan or Hong Kong and you decide to enjoy a delicious cup of Asian coffee, which is often very strong and keep you energized for hours, and had a mishap that you desire to share with the Chinese people around you. Say “I bumped into a coffee table!,” then Ai Bang Mai Fu Kin Ni.
The eighth phrase may appear rude but it is a constructive advice for certain elderly individual, who stand to benefit from the advice if they have they financial resources to undergo elective surgery and reclaim their youthful face. Say “I think you need a face lift!,” then “Chin Tu Fat.”
The ninth phrase is useful to know when traveling abroad in China, Taiwan or Hong Kong and the place you are patronaging lack adequate lighting. Say “It’s very dark in here!,” then “Wai So Dim.”
The tenth phrase is useful to know when traveling abroad in a Chinese-speaking country and you happen to see a good-looking girl and you want to pick her up. Say “I thought you were on a diet!,” then “Wai Yu Mun Ching.”
The eleventh phrase comes in handy while for some reason you want to be help to a Chinese person who is ignorant as to where he or she may park with impunity. Say “This is a tow away zone!,” then “No Pah King.”
The twelfth phrase comes in handy when a Chinese person has a bad memory, shows up early for a meeting or is suffering from memory loss. Say “Our meeting is scheduled for next week!, then “Wai Yu Kum Nao.”
The thirteenth phrase is useful to know when traveling abroad in China, Taiwan or Hong Kong and the scene is too wild for your liking, or perhaps simply dull and uninteresting. Say “Staying out of sight,” then “Lei Ying Lo.”
The fourteenth phrase may come in handy if, for example, the parent of a Chinese girl, who you have impregnated is looking for you. Say “He’s cleaning his automobile,” then “Wa Shing Ka.”
The fifteenth phrase is useful to know when traveling abroad in China, Taiwan or Hong Kong and the locals happen to be afflicted with some of the worst cases of body odor ever. say “Your body odour is offensive!,” then “Yu Stin Ki Pu.”
The eleventh phrase comes in handy while traveling abroad in China, Taiwan or Hong Kong and you experience some adverse event and need to speak sarcastically to some Chinese person, who appears concern for your unfortunate experience. Say “Great!,” then “Fa Kin Su Pa.”
You have successfully completed the “How to learn Chinese in 5 minutes funny” learning program. However, to truly master our unique method of learning the Chinese language in only 5 minutes a day, you must read aloud the preceding 16 phrases, first the English phrases and then the its Chinese equivalence, every day! In no time, you would be well equipped to travel abroad to any Chinese-speaking country on Earth, be it China, Taiwan or Hong Kong, and be able to converse with your fellow Chinese Earthlings. This in turn opens up a new world of opportunities to you. Make Chinese friends. Get a Chinese girlfriend. Do business with Chinese people. In short, the possibilities that may be obtained from the learning of the Chinese language is limitless, subject only to the limits of your imagination.